Now another belief held by many Christians is that Christ lived a celibate lifestyle. That he was perfectly clean and pure in his life, and that He could not have a wife as a distraction from His holy work.
This belief is interesting to look at. It reveals several things that have permeated Christian beliefs about marriage. But these beliefs are not backed by scripture. One of these beliefs is that celibacy is superior to matrimony. So when did this practice of celibacy first start becoming a require among the priests? It turns out that until around 1000AD that priests could be married and have children. Then the policy began to be changed because of abuses in the church. By about 1100 one could not be ordained to any position in the church unless one had publicly made a vow to abstain from marriage for life.
So what did Christ say and teach about marriage.
"And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder."
Matthew 19:4-6
Let us analyze these teachings. Firstly God created make and female. Two parts that go together to form a whole. Ok, let this idea sink in. God created both man and woman.
"And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."
Genesis 2:23-24
God created a companion for Adam because man needs woman and in turn woman needs man. Now I could point out further scriptures in this matter (Ephesians 5:22-33, 1st Corinthians 7:1-16) but my focus is on the teachings of Christ Himself both His words and example.
Now we know that Jesus, being recognized by the Jews as a great teacher was often called Rabbi.
"Then Jesus turned, and saw them following, and saith unto them, What seek ye? They said unto him, Rabbi, (which is to say, being interpreted, Master,) where dwellest thou?"
John 1:38
"There was a man of the Pharisees, named Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews: The same came to Jesus by night, and said unto him, Rabbi, we know that thou art a teacher come from God: for no man can do these miracles that thou doest, except God be with him."
John 3:1-2
"When the people therefore saw that Jesus was not there, neither his disciples, they also took shipping, and came to Capernaum, seeking for Jesus. And when they had found him on the other side of the sea, they said unto him, Rabbi, when camest thou hither?"
John 6:24-25
So that he was called Rabbi is very clear. What many people do not know is that in order to be called Rabbi, one was typically married. Now I have found no clear indication that marriage was required, but Rabbis were considered to be great teachers, and in order to be great teacher they had to have both learning and experience. They were frequently consulted in regards to marriage and children. If a man did not have the experience, he was not regarded as a Rabbi. The Jews had no laws encouraging celibacy (outside certain Essene sects, even among them it was rare), and on the contrary, men were encouraged by law to have children to carry on the family line. Those who had no offspring often felt shame among Jewish society.
"And God remembered Rachel, and God hearkened to her, and opened her womb. And she conceived, and bare a son; and said, God hath taken away my reproach:"
Genesis 30:22-23
Now reevaluating Matthew 9:4-6 we see that Christ is clearly giving advice related to marriage and divorce. He clearly states that the union between man and woman is ordained of God. Now Christ came to fulfill the law, and the law states that man and woman are made for each other. Therefore, one can readily conclude that if Christ was not married yet gave advice on marriage, He would be considered a hypocrite.
Now more information can be found in examining further scripture. Let us look at the following story of Christ.
"Now it came to pass, as they went, that he entered into a certain village: and a certain woman named Martha received him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, which also sat at Jesus’ feet, and heard his word. But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me. And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her."
Luke 10:38-42
Now look at this connection that exists between these two women and Jesus. Let us examine this story with an open mind by putting ourselves in Christ's place for a moment. If you were a great teacher, and you went to visit someone's home, and teach them, and one of the people at the home is busy with serving you and the other guests. Now suppose one of the people at this home was expected to help serve, but us instead listening to you as you teach. Would it not be proper for a complaint to be filed with the head of the household? When have you ever heard of a matter like this passage being brought before a guest?
The story sounds quite odd to say the least that Christ as a guest would be asked to resolve the matter. But if Christ was the head of household, in other words the husband, then the story makes far more sense. In this story you see several important points. Mary sat at Jesus feet. This would indicate a closeness between them. She is sitting exactly where Christ is. If she was a random person, such a placement would be inappropriate. But as Christ's wife that position would be natural. She would desire to be near her husband.
This next bit may anger some, but I cannot stop at revealing that Jesus was married to Mary, but that Martha was also His wife. Polygamy was not considered sinful in scriptural times. It is commonplace in the Old Testament, and was still widely practiced in the New Testament period among the Jews. We tend to think of it as sinful only because of centuries of Christian tradition wherein celibacy is presented as superior to marriage, and monogamy in like manner would be better that polygamy for the same reasons.
In these passages, Martha clearly deals with Jesus as head of household yet it states that it was Martha's home. This connection is further affirmed by the fact that Christ states Martha's name twice "Martha, Martha". To speak to someone in that matter is a term of endearment. Further He stated that she is "careful and troubled about many things". This statement affirms that Christ knows Martha very well.
I will not quote it here but I recommend my readers see John 11. This chapter actually shows that Christ was particularly close to this family. Why? Because Martha and Mary were His wives, and Lazarus was His brother in law.
"There they made him a supper; and Martha served: but Lazarus was one of them that sat at the table with him.
Then took Mary a pound of ointment of spikenard, very costly, and anointed the feet of Jesus, and wiped his feet with her hair: and the house was filled with the odour of the ointment.
Then saith one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, Simon’s son, which should betray him, 'Why was not this ointment sold for three hundred pence, and given to the poor?' This he said, not that he cared for the poor; but because he was a thief, and had the bag, and bare what was put therein.
Then said Jesus, 'Let her alone: against the day of my burying hath she kept this.'"
John 12:2-7
Again Martha is serving because she is Christ's wife, He is hosting this Passover supper. Then Mary anoints the feet of her husband. Random strangers do not behave this way. Then when Judas criticized her for using expensive oil in this way, Jesus defends her, as a husband defends his wife. And when He explains her reasons for doing this anointing, we learn that she had purchased it and kept it for this day, so that she could perform this ordinance unto her husband.
"And there was Mary Magdalene, and the other Mary (Christ's mother), sitting over against the sepulcher. Now the next day, that followed the day of the preparation,..."
Matthew 27:61-62
"The first day of the week cometh Mary Magdalene early, when it was yet dark, unto the sepulchre, and seeth the stone taken away from the sepulchre. Then she runneth, and cometh to Simon Peter, and to the other disciples, whom Jesus loved, and saith unto them, They have taken away the Lord out of the sepulchre, and we know not where they have laid him."
John 20:1-2
"But Mary stood without at the sepulchre weeping: and as she wept, she stooped down, and looked into the sepulchre, And seeth two angels in white sitting, the one at the head, and the other at the feet, where the body of Jesus had lain. And they say unto her, Woman, why weepest thou? She saith unto them, Because they have taken away my Lord, and I know not where they have laid him.
And when she had thus said, she turned herself back, and saw Jesus standing, and knew not that it was Jesus.
Jesus saith unto her, 'Woman, why weepest thou? whom seekest thou?' She, supposing him to be the gardener, saith unto him, 'Sir, if thou have borne him hence, tell me where thou hast laid him, and I will take him away.'
Jesus saith unto her, 'Mary'. She turned herself, and saith unto him, Rabboni; which is to say, Master. Jesus saith unto her, 'Touch me not; for I am not yet ascended to my Father: but go to my brethren, and say unto them, I ascend unto my Father, and your Father; and to my God, and your God'.
Mary Magdalene came and told the disciples that she had seen the Lord, and that He had spoken these things unto her."
John 30:11-18
Now a question to my readers. Why was Mary present before He was prepared to be buried at a ceremony that only the closest members of the family were permitted to attend? Why is Mary at the tomb of Jesus? Why did Mary return to the sepulcher after they discovered that Christ's body had been taken? Why did she have so much concern about where the body had been taken? The answer is obvious. He was her husband, and not only had she just had to go through the devastating loss of her dearly beloved, but upon arriving at the tomb, to dress the body (recall that He had been buried promptly to avoid breaking the Sabbath), they discover He is gone, so she is struggling with the added grief that now His body is missing.
My hope is to show using the scriptures that are commonly accepted by Christians to show that Christ was married, that marriage was an important part of who he was and what he taught, that marriage did not detract from his holy calling, and that Christ in His mortal state was fully human. Ladies and gentlemen, marriage is not sinful. In fact, according to scripture, it was one of the first commandments God gave to men.