Pornography

Perhaps the greatest of the common addictions is pornography. Of the series of common addictions that can shatter marriages, I have saved this for last, because of all the major problems, this one in particular is the most damaging. 

Many who view pornography claim it does no harm. They claim it doesn't hurt anyone. In fact some even argue that it can prevent people from acting out their fantasies. I have to disagree. In my view, and I will state it boldy, pornography is adultery.  Why is this so?

Let's turn to the words of Christ. 

"Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." Matthew 5:27-28

Now isn't this verse plain. Does this not describe pornography perfectly?  When men view pictures or videos of scantily clad or naked women, are they not lusting after them? Are they not desiring to be pleased by these images?  Are they not seeking to satisfy an appetite?  

Notice the savior refers to this committing adultery in their hearts. Those that claim it prevents them from acting out their fantasies, does it not still corrupt their hearts?  Are they not seeking after a vile corruption?  This doesn't even apply to pornography strictly. You could have a women wearing modest clothing, yet have a man with a dirty mind ogling her and imagining when she looks like naked or fantasizing about her. This may not hurt the woman at all, but what does entertaining such thoughts do to the mind of the individual who entertains them?  Is not the damage done to the mind and heart just as real as if they had actually physically commited adultery?

Viewing pornography lessens the value of women in the minds of men. It makes men value the physical outward appearance and physical sensations, while it detaches them and isolates them from forming a real emotion connection. A man who views pornography does not value his wife as a wonderful intelligent person or as a valuable soulmate. He instead regards her as his property, to be enjoyed at his discretion. 

Furthermore that man's wife must compete with pornography.  She will feel inadequate in comparison with her husbands expectations and fantasies. She will feel like she is not pretty enough, and he will desire something from her that cannot give. 

This does not apply exclusively to men. Ladies, erotic romance novels are your pornography. Reading about it is no different than looking at it. It is just as as destructive. Can a real man compete with a woman's fantasies?  Do these novels portray realistic or truly desirable men?  I say they do not. They set you up for unrealistic expectations, and this will interfere with your relationships. 

These things prevent a true unity and bond and trust in your relationships. They cause you to focus on the outward shallow physical appearance and turn meaningful intimacy into nothing more than just another form of entertainment.